Let's talk about the new expansion!

DING 85! Oh wait that happened last year. Umm, yeah, ding awesome spells! Errr, wait there aren't any. Hmm, Oh I know Ding new AA's! Nah, they suck and are unthoughtful.
To be honest nothing in the new expansion is new except this...
Cast Spell, summon, 7k, 7k, 7k, 7k, Return to bind, 7k, 7k, 7k....
With visions of Gates of Discord raping in my head! Thank you Sony for putting anyone who is casually geared, (no one in our guild of course), in a place where they won't get anything for a long time as the Mercs can't sustain any of that punishment!
And that achievement system, which I was personally looking forward to, looks like a last minute oh yeah lets put that in there as well instead of something fun and helping to spice up the game a bit. Good job at siphoning money out of the masses!

Ok enough of the bashing Sony stuff. You guys wanna hear about new kills!
Well lets see there have been more then one new guild firsts in the past two months. In fact there have been 10 guild firsts! I know, I slack. Bite me.
I won't go through for the grats on all the targets will only point out a thing or two from the last target. But to the naysayers I offer you this. When I last updated we had all of the Tower of Discord plus two events in the Earth Expedition!

I'm not going to bother doing a grats on the gear gotten there as most has been upgraded with gear since then, but a hearty grats to those who won gear on those two mobs. Oh and yes I was drinking when I was cutting and pasting that pic.

So obviously that leaves us with 8 events to talk about.

Those events are:

1. Mindblight
2. Trophy Room
3. Stasis
4. Scrying
5. Sacrifice
6. Elite Tower Guards (ok not a real event but has a lockout)
7. Overlord Muram
8. Edge of Destruction

I was going to talk about how hard these events were, the trials, blood, sweat and tears that went into each and every event... but minus the tears from Tryg, none of that happened. As a matter of fact there is an old saying that goes like this. A Picture is worth a 1000 Words.

Grats to Balogh on Fateslayer

Tendil on Cloak of Darkest night

Jitatha and Ayochak on Phased Coeveal incandessence

So we beat Seeds of Destruction two days after launch of Underfoot. Not bad for some casual raiding lunactics!
Although, it is of my opinion, that we beat the true boss of SoD last October when we beat the Zek brothers!
If you doubt me, take these statistics into mind. We were the 53rd guild, server wide, to beat the Citadel.
So far only 50 have beaten the Earth Theme, and a good chunk of them geared up in Tower to beat the Zek brothers.

The only thing we have left to do for progression is best told to you by someone who has experience on the topic.

So I'd like to say be safe during this holiday season, good cheer and all that bah humbug.
With That I leave you with these small quotes from out ever colorful ... guild chat.

Jit has been listening to Jeff Foxworthy lately, and put a bit of twist on you might be a redneck if...

Do you love chocolate? I love chocolate? Who else loves Chocolate?

Mythrill loves choclate as well!

We got some new people in guild... but where are they?

Who could be the leader of this conspiracy?????!?!?!?!

Who hasn't gotten enough Ranger hate? Take a look at this pic

So Jit asked the question...

But thats not all! Even SONY knows that rangers suck!

Speaking of hate, there is a new form. Its Pally on SK

Slappah was late one day and Jitatha had to inform him about priorities

Jitatha has been hanging out with the Pallies too much!

Hardabit has had troubles lately...but you kind of wonder. What the F*** is wrong with Paladins?
Speaking of Hardabit. Anyone who gets culinary advice from Siegfried is asking for it!

Since we are on the subject of Pallies and recently talked about Jitatha. This quote begs to wonder. Is Jit lieing or not? After all he is a Vah Shir.
First we have admitance

Then we have denial!

But that statement does make you wonder. How the hell does Sieg know?

Please though don't get Sieg Excited

Or else he might try to lure people in

At least the paladins have someone to talk to on more senitive matters dealing with animals

Enough with Siegfried, what about Tryg you ask? Well Hardabit was trying to give him advice since he's always down on his luck.

I was beginning to think Tryg was getting older and starting to develop standards

I thought wrong

Well everyone, thats enough for this installment, I might blow bandwidth if I keep going. Since it is the Holiday Season, I was searching for the sort of zen moment that would fit the season. with all this talk about Sieg, I could only come up with this!

Until next year

Aeryonis Getitoffmegetitoff

12:11pm CET, 20th Dec 2009

Ok well not really, but we beat what is in the minds of all end game raiders THE hardest event in the Seeds of Destruction expansion.
Zek Brothers, Tallon and Vallon. Are they brothers or lovers? Reguardless of their orientation we knocked the socks off these two purple idiots!

Grats to Leleane on Fractured Primeval Incandessence
and Icyen on Capu-Tuk, the Painstriker

It took us a long time to figure that event out and to get only 2 loots.... yeah someones going to die tonight.....

So we wondered around the zone and ran into this guy..

Defeating those three tools opened up the Rallos Returns event. After beating our heads against the Zek brothers for a good 4 weeks (mind you we only raid 3 times a week,) we thought god now we have to kill there dad! Two hours into our next raid day...

We've already cracked this nut again since Last week...

Grats Keaerian and Finelarya on Earthbound Cinch
Ardbeg on Adelstone Earring
Gillgamesh on Krossmaul
Grats Xatranaz, Girtan, Jitatha and Docoe on Warped Primeval Incandessence

So what does that leave for us here in WoT to do before December you ask? Only have The fall of Toskirakk event (which we almost completed in a one shot one killed) and naturally the 7 events in Citadel of the Worldslayer!

We are Wind of Tranquility, and we are the best damn casual raiding guild serverwide. Period!

We enjoy the content, kick its ass, and wave at the high elf chicks on the way out. Yes Daska only wave, good troll.
Until next time ladies and gentlemen, I leave you with the lighter side of WoT!

Three encounters ranging from annoying, to boring to wtf! Yes that's right, the Three Stooges of Everquest. Larry, curly and shithead.
I'll take you through these mobs...close your eyes, relax, nevermind the hand on your wallet.. oh yeah that's right, everquest update. Sorry about that.

So we started playing with mobs in Korafax as if yo haven't guessed by now. Venomlord, Pallorax, and the Mindshear Avatar.
The first mob we encountered, mainly as we were all running around the zone aimlessly, was Pallorax. An Extremely annoying fight.
Actually its more annoying with his fear. Having switched from a tune that had the fearless AA to a toon in a dress (no it's not pink) I got to feel what others have felt for the past 3 years. No wait, there really hasn't been a mob with fear in a while...
Basically you engage this asshat, drop him x amount of % and he runs off like a girl in a skined knee. Sometimes he runs, sometimes he warps.. yup Sony at it's best. Then you have to stop him from being a tosser on his minions. Rinse repeat so many times and a win. Sounds easy right?
really, Really, REally, REAlly, REALly, REALLy, REALLY annoying!

Grats Jitatha on Corpse Hook
Utuzeneth on Ksathrax's Toxiferous Ring
Weawen on Ache
Gorduins on Tunare's Tear
Saundra and Gwindar on Horned Broo Mask
and Rodlik, Balogh, Finelarya, Lueamian, and Jitata x2 on Distorted Primeval Luminessence

Moving on we encounted Venom Lord Ksathrax. Interesting look. I have always liked the look of this model, even back in Gates of Discord expansion. But alas, sony made it boring. Slap him a couple hundred times, oh no's! Here come adds. Slap him down some more.... oh no's he split. Slap him some more, oh no's adds again! Slap him some more oh no's adds again. What we have to balance??!?!?!?!?! BURN BURN. Umm yeah, dead mob n stuff.

Grats Boggi on Mask of Dark Tidings
Valkarie and Siegried on Buckler of Defeated Champions
Finelarya and Weawen on Phased Primeval Luminessence
Tinyhealer on Scourge Drape of the Maelfic
Aeryonis, Gorduins, Badabum, Mythril, Jitatha, and Keaerian on Phased Primeval Incandessence
Icyen and Keaerian on Sigil of Pain
and Daska and Xatranaz no Coruscite Band of Vigilence

Well that's two down. That only leaves shithead. That's right the new champion of wtf raids. When I asked siegfried what he thought of the mindshear event, he gave me this response....

Hell even Jitatha gave us a Guild First in this event!

What can you say about a shitty event like this? I can only think of one thing...Thank god its dead!

Grats Keaerian on Ring of Forbearance
Knikob on Attendant's Collar
Xatranaz on Distorted Primeval Incandessence
and Girtan on Phased Prmeval incandessence

Well that's about all for now everyone, if you don't mind, I need to go take my dress to the dry cleaners, the Mindshear bled on it. But before I do I'll leave you with the less entertaining part of the update....

Khfara speaks from experience when he wants to get into raids when they are full!

He also wants all the ladies to know that...

Tryg likes to shock us every now and then. I thought the man had no standards at all!

Then he proved me right....

It's ok to make fun of Tryg, seriously he will never remember...

Icyen is proving to be the straight up freak in guild!

While Nickii knows the way to get the upgrades faster!

Now while I think she's attractive, it seems we have a few Megan Fox stalkers in our guild...

Valkarie was getting a bit busy the other night...

The age old question rehashed. Do we come to kill or....

Hardabit has a disfuntional family

Just when you thought miracles weren't possible...

Finelarya gives young Msha tips about the finer exotic points of life!

Wenamcea has to put her foot down as a guild leader from time to time...but... but... ah man.... come on!

Now for the moment of Zen, that peavful moment in everyone's eq carrier. There is Nothing and I mean NOTHING like getting a crit.... Unless it backfires...

Aeryonis Getitoffmegetitoff

12:38pm CEST, 25th Aug 2009

Lots of things have been dieing (mainly us,) as we have strated the progression in Crystallos!
We killed our first event and dragons back at the beginning of the fabled period.
So I thought hell, lets wait till fabled season is over with and I'll do this big thing because there might be new fableds.
Man I tell ya Sony never fails to disappoint. With the recession in full swing you could really feel it in Everquest.
10th year anniversary, and all I got was a title, 10kpp, and a "shiny" new roboboar. Ummm yeah at least make it a fast one.
Nope Sony made us run around on a wild goose chase for rehashed gear and clickies that do nothing that shoot fireworks.
Not like 95% of the EQ players have graffics turned down and most are still using the old school graffics!

So we cleared Plane of Time and killed Xegony out of revenge from last year.

Only Planes of Power fabled left unscathed was Cornaiv. Oh wait...He's still broken from last year.
Way to go Sony! You get the Retard Seal of approval!

I guess I shouldn't complain too much, at least we got cake....

But for you nay sayers we did do some of those boring raids. Epeen at it's finest?

So anyway let's get onto a meaningful update. Something with real RPG quality! DRAGONS!
No not the Dragons, Dragons, Dragons thing. Even though we cleared all through Big Bynn I. I'm talking about some that actually have DPS!
Crystallos, bloody confusing, not as much trash as MMM (thank god) but still a pain in the ass!
Four Elements to kill in here then bring down Kerafym the sleeping baby and you get another title and an attaboy from Sony!

Kildrukaun the Ancient Prophet: Not a difficult mob, but none the less a good loot mob.

Grats Shadowbeaver on Earring of Dragon's Fire
Tinyhealer on Facemask of Cleansing
Rodlok on Prismatic High Seer's Boots
and Keaerian on Prismatic Bow-Captain's Boots

Zeixshi`Kar
Grats Lueamien on Cloak of the Draconic Legion and Prismatic Hat of the Burning Wind
Brewce on Enveloping Chromascale Cloak
and Phartos on Prismatic Arch-Elementalist's Hat
No Screenies of this guy, people slack on the submissions.

Tjudawos the Ancient
Grats Brimir on Intricately Carved Greatsword
Sichlor on Flashing Prismatic Knucklewraps
Eteria on Prismatic Blackguard's Gauntlet's
Finelarya on Prismatic War-Bishop's Gauntlet's
and Gorduins on Prismatic Faycite
Again people slacking on Screen submissions.

We have tried our hand at Vyskudra and we think we might have the solution to this puzzle. As soon as that ice cold dwagon is down it's only a matter of a dry run and a kill before we beat Kerafym or however you spell the retarded lazy dwagon's name. I think Daska will have a stick of dynamite lit and in Kera's mouth before he realizes whats happening. Stay tuned.

Now onto SoD missions. We haven't just been doing Crystallos, that would be retarded (like sony.)
Queen Malarian, Rutro the Twisted and General Bahgresh are on rotation now, although we try not to do the General event much. It's just not worth the effort at times. We tried our hand at Field of Scale raids. I've heard that they are insanely ... easy. And they were.

The Library was a bit of a complicated mess, but with the help of the iksar tripping over there own robes, we did it.

Grats Slappah on Lizard Spine Coercer
Qanlaen on Council's Mantle
and Utuzeneth on Eon Woven Cloth Wristband

I took a whole bunch of pics, then I cut them and screwed them up. My bad.

Now Field of Scale raid Kurns was available for touching. So we touched it. We touched it HARD!
Grats Rulltufs on Tower Champions Shield
Cozzs on Eon Forged Plate Vambraces
and O M G HE SPENT DKP! Jitatha on Eon Hardened Leather Gloves

With Kurns in the books we turned our attention toward the Final Confrontation! And we did just that, made it final.
Grats Keaerian on Eon Linked Chain Leggings
Keawedar on Eon Linked Chain Boots
Cozzs on Eon Forged Plate Breastplate
and Mythrill on Bridle of the Flying Imperial Sokokar

Now onto the lighter side of things which is why your actually still reading this dribble. Gnome hate: Nothing sweeter than it, except a dead ranger. WoT has it's share of the midget misfits, but sometimes they try so hard to be smart, that I think they even confuse themselves. Take a look at what Msha had to say about a new aug slot.

The conversation came up that a rival guild had somehow passed us in progression. To that we said who did what? As if we care if someone rushes through content. All it is in the end is O M G look at my epeen. Such an angry inch. But lets see the comments about epeen and how it relates to the gnome population.

Of course you can't have a good game of tennis without a ball.

How about the recession? How's that treating you? Jitatha has found ways to avoid this tragedy.

Speaking of Jitatha, he's been a bit different lately. Maybe its the recession maybe not. Who know's. But one thing is for sure, he has urges like every man, and sometimes he needs those urges fulfilled!

And sometimes he just gets strait down to the point.

And to really seal the deal he gives his opion's of the life expectancy of a mage in combat!

Shadowbeaver got caught rushing back to the raid to be there on time! It really gets on my nerves when guildies jump ship to the higher end guilds. But there is one thing that's worse. When Guildies change to the mobs side...

Could it be that the mobs have invaded Nocturnes mind as well?

Now Trygvve has been TRYING to lay low and not get into the front page. But it seems he just can't control himself!

The Warriors have been making me wonder, what REALLY goes on in the tank channel. Do they have a wotwarrior channel with the password gaylords? Daska was interested in a new technique he had to leave raid!

Sometimes I really do think they are in a gay porn ring. The jealousy can really heat up! You tell me, is Tryg jealous or spot on?

Tryg proves he likes some man to man relations

It's gotten so bad that Guuz has been infected!

I asked Hardabit what he thinks of the new fabled adventure raids this year.

I couldn't agree with you more. Nerf pallies. Since we are talking about Hardabit, let's see his few of foreplay

When asked how his night out with the boys were, we were greeted with a colorful conversation!

Now either I'm loose as they come, or Hardabit is just well... small. You Decide, remember... he's a dwarf.

One good thing is when people conduct personnel hygiene. Nothing says purity like a freshly washed ass. But what happens when you trim your toe nails at the computer while waiting for raid to start?

Now its not often, ok I've never done it, that I crack jokes about myself. But I figured 1 year of doign these I can do it.
I was having a conversation with a few guildies, and this particular conversation was with Istanora. Now these were TELLS mind you, private pm's nothing out of the ordinary, but you know they are kind of well private. After all, the P in PM is Private Message. Somethings just aren't sacred anymore

Doing this front page over the past year has led to a lot of distrust in me. I can't understand why.

Well that wraps up this edition of WoT updates, I leave you with not one but two moments of zen
Remember before going into war you need your warface!

Nothing spells Fabled, then rogues screwing with corpses!

Loladene Dethwytch

12:48pm CEST, 25th May 2009